Dane. Designer.

Old Blog

I'm an Arrogant Fuck, a Pathetic Geek, a Fucking Fanboy and a Sorry Loser.

“If we shadows have offended, think but this, and all is mended. That you have but slumbered here, while these visions did appear, and this weak and idle theme, no more yielding but a dream. Gentles, do not reprehend. If you pardon, we will mend. And as I’m an honest Puck, if you have unearned luck, now to scape the serpent’s tongue, we shall make amends ere long. Give me your hands, if we be friends, and Robin shall restore amends.”

I wanted to write a long thing about The Matrix Trilogy. I wanted to really get lost in its mythology, its characters, the style it uses, the art, the story, symbolisms, references and all the stuff that makes my brain go all gooey when I get into geek mode. I wanted to try and convey how much I loved and still love all of the movies and the mythology built up around it. And I wanted to try and explain to you, how much this series has meant to me, my craft and my future doings.

But I won’t.

I won’t because quite frankly it isn’t worth the effort. I could write a book about it and it wouldn’t make a lick of difference because the verdict is in and it’s not looking good. At least not to the favor of The Matrix. In fact it looks like a deliberate lynching.

And I don’t understand why.

I like movies. Okay. A lot.

And while comparisons of this and that could be made, comparing it to art, music, history, philosophy, religion etc. I won’t play charades. I love movies because they give me context and pleasure. That’s it. That’s all there is to it.

When I was a kid I first saw the likes of Cameron’s classics The Terminator and Aliens. I am sure that many of you had the same experience as me, in that these movies, like the Star Wars trilogy, somehow managed to live on inside your head. They transported us into that dropship and into that trench. They made us fight for our lives and dream of a world where our lives had a meaning; the fight for freedom.

What I saw on that screen Wednesday night was the logical conclusion to that childhood dream. It was all that I had built up since I was a kid, and to me it was all that that I had made it up to be. This was it, the dark future. This was where mankind had to make its last stand against the machines, the aliens and all the other nasty things that go ‘klang’ in the night.

This had all the fear, desperation, hatred, love and pure kinetic energy that I would ever had expected from it. This was the trench run of A New Hope, the Hoth battle from Empire, the race to the core of the Deathstar from Jedi, the last 20 minutes of Terminator, the last 40 minutes of T2, the last stand in Aliens, the opening of Saving Private Ryan, Bits and pieces of The Longest Day and so on, all rolled up into one.

When I see the complete picture of everything that The Matrix currently encompasses I see a fantastic canvas of modern science-fiction. And I wish I could show that canvas to the people who don’t appreciate it in the same way that I do. I wish I could make you see; make you appreciate what this is, what significance this has. But that’s like explaining the punch line of an in-joke; it’ll destroy the intention.

I have a few regrets. First of all I wish I had someone to share my joy with. I think I blinked three times while in the cinema, my knuckles where white from clenching my legs and my smile was pretty much chiseled in concrete the rest of the night. I wish I could share that with my friends.

Secondly I wish that the average reviewer put as much back, sweat and tears into their work as I do when I get really worked up. I spent probably around 5-6 hours writing the Kill Bill entry from the other day, and it’s not even a finished piece. Having shuffled through tens and tens of online reviews I think I can safely say that some of these ‘reviewers’ failed to spend more than 5-10 minutes on their ‘reviews’. And that’s including the résumé of the movie, as pointless as that is. Should they do that, then perhaps they would find that they can discover new things about the movies through writing. When I walked out of the cinema from watching Kill Bill I was pretty non-plussed, it took a lot of consideration to reach my final conclusion and it took some determination to reach the final entry. All I ask of them is to love movies as much as their readers. Or weave the space for someone who does. That is if nothing else, the only reason why I still have some respect for Ain’t It Cool News. At least it’s genuine.

Oh yes. One more thing. If I see one more pun with the use of ‘re’-something or the use of such idiotic terms as Wa-chew-ski (as in “They bit off more than they could Wa-chew-ski”), then I don’t know what I’ll do. It pains me to know that these peoples opinions are taken seriously and that they often actually receive payment for what they do.

The Matrix franchise was never a series that aimed for the general public. Magically it managed to become a raging success and that led people to believe that this was a movie for them. Well it wasn’t. It’s for us. It’s for the people who love the poses, the movements, the references and all that other stuff that the general public fails to notice anyway. It’s for the people who bothered to watch the Animatrix from beginning till end. It’s for the people who see the canvas, the people who dreamed a dream when they were kids and the people who wear their geeks on their collar.

And if that makes me an arrogant fuck, a pathetic geek, a fucking fanboy or a sorry loser then so be it.

The Matrix Has Me.